2015-11-04 The guy’s sign said WILL WORK FOR FOOD. “Any good at raking leaves?” I asked. He nodded. Turns out, he was really good at it. He raked the front and back yards, and bagged everything. “Well done,” I said. “What do you want to eat?” He sank his fangs into my neck and drank my blood. I almost laughed at the cleverness of his sign. After all, he had done work for me, his food. Somehow, I managed to jam the rake handle through his chest to kill him. Thank goodness I didn’t ask him to mow the lawn, too.